One decade— one decade that throughout a lifespan is invariably looked forward to, and then back upon: your twenties; twenty through twenty nine. What is it about these 10 years that produce such an extraordinarily high level of feeling, a true passion as if the soul is sparked? Often resulting in breath taking highs and heart wrenching lows, along with the reaching of a few milestones and the experiencing of a few more mistakes, which compose your twenties and make them the best and worst days of your life.
1) -Busiest (bound by obligation).
Between jobs, education, finances, career prep, family, friendships, companionship, and whatever other activity you keep yourself accountable to perform, it is nothing short of amazing that it all can be done within their alotted timeframes. At few other times in life is one required to balance such responsibility; schooling in youth, employment in adulthood, and much of both during the in between years; where it can get difficuilt to keep everything underneath control once there is much much more to keep beneath, but if achieved the reward is a life of purpose and fulfillment, but the work begins inside these years.
Although Business is a known component of the years of twenty, it does in part assist in establishing a sense of liberty. Independence is found, though our ambitions may occupy us. Free at last, free at last; free to be who you are, react on the heart’s desire, to establish an opinion of your own, to finally pursue what drives your passion; to deviate, to conform, free to believe or denounce, to think for yourself, to choose where you go from here. And best yet, it is for the first time in a lifetime this liberation is truly experienced.
3) -Between married and party friends (if time for friends).
On rare occasion when the time to be social does present itself, it becomes apparent that half of everyone you still keep in touch with are either married/play the part with a significant other; children most likely (married or not). The other half finding themselves under too many influences to properly function, liberated from responsibility and often negligent to obligation. The company of neither enjoyable over a few hours.
4) -Building the foundation for the rest of your life (marriage/family, college/careers).
Though each tread seperarate paths, seeking different destinations, our lives will mold and form around who we are with, and what we do. By these ages, on average, lifetime partners and lifetime careers are selected, following it’s progression, and ultimate outcome. The decisions made inside of those days will determine what tomorrow will entail, and with empowerment to make such decision comes anxious excitement.
5) -Broke (busy yet broke).
Being steadily swamped is extraordinarily frustrating, but what heavily salts this wound is feeling overloaded in contrast to being broke, coming to the harsh realization that life is expensive. During these demanding moments in life it is almost required to be in constant motion, which can be financially conflicting when it costs to exit the front door. In addition to inhumane education costs, there are varieties of mandatory financial investments, housing and reliable transportation being a few. Salary scale payments made on an hourly shift equals the occasional cup of noodles or hot pocket lunch.
6) -Everything that is legal (and some not) become possible.
In addition to the liberation of ones twenties comes the legal freedom to enter into adult locations and consume substance of high exclusivity and maturity. Far superior than the actual ability to buy drinks and access those places is the simple knowing that there are no further limitations; both in the figurative and literal sense, of course accompanied by the enjoyment and shananigans that come with this newly acquired capability.
7) -Expectation VS reality.
Expectation is a root that plants sorrow and while approaching the days of twenty, it is simple to overlook the trial and hardships that the decade will entail with having already painted a completely different image of what these moments would look like; envisioning triumph without considering the tribulation, or endless festivities without celebratory cause, until the days arrive and happen different than anticipated. Growing up for lack of a better term sucks and tends to suck much harder when you spend your youth waiting in unanswered hope that it won’t.
8) -New found appreciation for childhood occurances.
Many aspects of life are so vague in adolescence, many of such unappreciable until later years. True appreciation for all things from sacrifices loved ones had made, to posessions and opportunities possessed that in reality are not possessed by all. Appreciation and gratitude illuminated in the light of understanding, because it is difficuilt to feel pure gratitude and thankfulness while lacking competence– all of which a product of growing up.
9) -A goodbye to the bliss of youthful ignorance.
Beautiful carelessness. Sandbox ball pit schoolyard summer night Saturday morning carelessness. Where great dilemmas consist of missing the ice cream man or a lunch spent in solitude; not because we did not care but because we were not obligated to. Not required to do much of anything. To an extent not even required to look after your own self. A simpler time that we can never reposess. When the only factors to weigh out while decision making is 1) whether or not it will bring enjoyment, and 2) whether or not it will bring punishment. The twenties is a final farewell to those precious days that once were, and to the child that once was, never forgetting those youthful days, but knowing deep within that they are now and forever more in the past.
10) -Opportunity to see, feel, and experience all you want while you can.
Youth, ambition, energy, opportunity, independence, adventure, and opportunity; components of the years of twenty. Opportunity being most crucial. Now is the time; to take what you want, and go where you feel lead. With independence comes establishing identity, so let your journey help you find it. Opportunity comes also from ability to fail in this time. Trial and error is vital in order to find an answer, so go out there and fail. Fail harder than anyone has ever failed at what is being failed. Fail, fail, fail and fail again if you must; just don’t stop or quit failing. Continue to fail until you find what you succeed in, and know that each failed attempt is a step closer to your destination.
||”With my bare hands I can move the earth. Just cause I said it in my verse.
That’s the power of words.”||
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little lighter thief
Stared straight through me with eyes so assuming, to her was ammusing; just the sight of the stare. As if she knew matters of which I was not aware. These eyes that invited, invited to explore. When she said as I felt “You know we’ve been here before. You and I in this place, some time ago.” My intrigue then in turn had grown cold, sparked a light as she said “Lifetimes ago our souls had grown old.” Finding truth in every word that she spoke, until the moment she vanished into her smoke. Feeling provoked, so inclined to remind her, chased her into the night, “Pardon miss, you’ve forgotten my lighter!” It’s hers she pleads, and I was not going to fight her, “Keep it” she insists, “after all it’s just a lighter.”
The question I’ve yet to reveal,
It lingers now, and follows me still. I felt it in my youth as I feel it as I’m grown
Was it her lighter, or was it my own? I look back on this as merely a dream, pay it no regard, constant disbelief. But she will always be my little lighter thief, she’ll always be my little lighter thief.
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